I never claimed to be the next Einstein but I did think I was smarter than this.
Today was my last shift as BMW Assistant (or Custodian's custodian) and as usual I spent my two hours wasting time with the occasional emptying of a trashcan. Fifteen minutes before the end of my shift I entered the locker room to respond to some texts and slowly change out of my uniform.
Suddenly I was distracted by a pink object on one of the benches. The object was attached to a heavy keychain and I was excited. I had just been looking at the pink thing yesterday. It belonged to one of the girls I do dish with and was too afraid to ask what it was. So, being the only one in the locker room, I picked it up to inspect it.
It was pink and said USA on the side. For some reason my mind said "Perfume!" and I got really excited because I love perfumes. I turned the little nozzle thing away from me an pressed down the button. A spray of pumpkin soupy looking liquid emitted forth and cover the wall. Surprised, but not deterred, I dropped the keychain back onto the bench and stepped forward to see what it was. I leaned in until my nose touched the liquid on the wall and inhaled.
It was pepper spray.
My nose felt like it was going to fall off, my throat burned.
Never, ever inhale pepper spray.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
So I'm No Genius.
Labels:
adventures,
college,
Isla Vista,
misadventure,
near death,
pepper spray,
work
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